


Sweet Dreams

by valentina_93



Category: Torchwood
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Sexual Content, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-24
Updated: 2017-01-24
Packaged: 2018-09-19 14:07:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 14,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9444746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/valentina_93/pseuds/valentina_93
Summary: -Tosh love! –she suddenly heard from the house’s entrance. That voice, she thought, she couldn’t believe that. –You’ve come back soon! –she turned to look at the man who had just talked to her. Owen was there, before the entrance, he was wearing a soiled cooking pinafore, a pair of glasses and, curiously, he was wearing a beard. –Why don’t you come in? We’ve baked biscuits! –he concluded, with a dazzling smile.





	1. Chapter 1

The taxi arrived at the suburb of Cardiff, it travelled along a large tree-lined avenue and stopped in front of a beautiful redbrick house.  
-Wake up Mrs Harper, we have arrived! Please, wake up! –the man repeated, trying to gently shake the woman who was seated asleep behind him.  
-Where… where are we? –she asked, feeling still confused. She opened her eyes and looked around, she was inside a cab and the driver was looking at her from his seat and was smiling.  
-At home. That was what you told me when we left, before falling asleep.  
-At home?  
Toshiko turned to the building next to which they had stopped. A wonderful redbrick house, a large garden and an eccentric blue door. The house she had always dreamed.  
-How much is it? –she asked, without taking her eyes off it.  
-It is 30 pounds, only because it is you! –he replied, sweetly smiling at her.  
Toshiko paid him quickly and got off the taxi, greeting him, and then she turned again to the house at Everest Street, 23. It had that something of familiar, she thought, and yet she was certain she had never seen it before.  
Suddenly the front door opened and two children appeared rushing toward her, she wondered who they were and if they could know her.  
-Mummy! –they shouted together. –You’re at home!  
Tosh felt shocked hearing them, however she instinctively knelt down to hug them. They were a boy and a girl, she was older than he was. He had distinct Asian features, while she had something familiar. Meanwhile she embraced them, she noticed she was wearing a wedding ring, which further shocked her.  
-Tosh love! –she suddenly heard from the house’s entrance. That voice, she thought, she couldn’t believe that. –You’ve come back soon! –she turned to look at the man who had just talked to her. Owen was there, before the entrance, he was wearing a soiled cooking pinafore, a pair of glasses and, curiously, he was wearing a beard. –Why don’t you come in? We’ve baked biscuits! –he concluded, with a dazzling smile.

* * *

-I think it can be around here.  
They were already walking for a half hour, and there was no trace of the alien artefact, they had detected near the football stadium.  
-It’s the sixth time you’ve said that, Tosh, but nothing yet! You know what? It’s probably in the clutches of a cat that’s having fun taking a walk around the block over and over again! Worse… it can be a rat. –Owen concluded, sighing.  
-The sixth one, really? –it was all Tosh had to reply.  
-Yes, after the third time, I’ve started counting them.  
The woman sighed, looking like she wanted to give up, when she saw an open pub behind Owen, the “Everest’s Peak”. –Maybe we should ask there, what do you think? Perhaps they saw something weird.  
Owen turned to the point she was looking at.  
-I don’t know, it’s probable. Why don’t you go in? They’d surely rather open up with a pretty girl, than with me! –he tried to convince her, smirking.  
He hadn’t come in a pub since the day Jack resuscitated him, and that was certainly an experience he had wanted to cross out.  
-All right! –she uttered, blushing.  
He watched her come in and moved closer to the glass window to look around the indoor. He had been there several times. A life ago, he thought and he noticed how perfectly fitting that statement was. Suddenly, he felt like he was being watched and he slowly turned to his right. There was a little girl, who, staying still, was staring at him with curiosity.  
-Hi! –he greeted her, quickly smiling.  
-Are you a ghost? –she asked him. Owen looked at her, confused.  
-Why am I supposed to be a ghost? –he questioned, noticing too late to have been a bit sharp with her.  
-Because you really seem a ghost!  
-Could I do this, if I were a ghost? –he told her, picking up a little stone and tossing it in the air, then kicking it away. –Now, why don’t you come back to your mum, before she gets worried? –the girl looked at him, still suspicious.  
-You’re a ghost! –she continued, before running away to the other side of the street, toward a woman.  
-You have to stop to annoy other people! I’m sorry! –she said to the girl, then turning to him.  
Owen watched them getting away. He couldn’t blame her, being in his conditions was like being a ghost.  
-Nothing at all! –Tosh roused him, leaving the pub. –But at least, I’ve got a free coffee! –she concluded, sighing, he looked at her and smiled.  
-He must have been very impressed with you then, that bloke even wants to get paid for water!  
-Though, I only wish he gave me some useful information! –she sighed again. –It’s impossible! Or maybe… what if it’s in the sewers? –she said, then.  
-Surely! And maybe some weevil’s having fun driving us crazy. Wanna me to go in and take a look? We know, they won’t lay a hair on my head! –he continued, hinting a smirk.  
-Ok, keep it.  
The woman gave the detector to him, who accidentally grabbed it with his left hand, dropping it. They bent down together to pick it up.  
-You know, sometimes I forget. –Owen admitted, gaze down, fixed on the device. –I mean, my fingers.  
Tosh put her hand on his shoulder, aware that he couldn’t feel it at all. –I’m sorry, Owen.  
-No need to worry, this hand isn’t much use anymore now! –he downplayed, showing her one of his typical saucy smirks. –Neither of those, actually.  
-Owen! –she scolded him, embarrassed.  
-And then, on the bright side, I don’t have to wear rings of any kind! Which isn’t that bad, look around you, Tosh, the rift, the aliens, how can it be possible to start a family, to raise children, aware of this?  
Tosh suddenly clouded hearing those words, cruel and sincere.  
-Right… –she replied, this time it was her who looked down.  
The silence was interrupted by the detector’s beeping, it was receiving the alien artefact again.  
-It’s near! For real this time! –she interrupted him before he could answer back.  
They walked the few meters that separated them from the exact point flagged by the device. Proceeding, they had reached a dirty narrow alley, the object was behind some garbage bins.  
-Is our rat at lunch? –he joked, making Tosh giggle.  
They moved a bin and saw it, it appeared to be a great metallic ring, the woman picked it up, it seemed more the size of a bracelet, along his diameter there was a brilliant red stone line.  
-Don’t you think it’s too easy? –she asked, sceptical, grabbing and examining it.  
-Well, it doesn’t have to always be pursuits and shooting! Jack, it’s Owen, we have it! –he continued, speaking on his comm.  
-What is it? –the man promptly answered.  
-It seems a sort of a metallic bracelet, we’re back soon.  
-Perfect!  
-Let’s go to the SUV, come on! –he told her, starting going ahead.  
Before Toshiko could reach him, the tool moved away from her hand and rose to the air reaching her height.  
-Owen?  
-Yeah? –he didn’t even have the time to turn, that he saw the artefact opening and holding onto the woman’s head. –Tosh! –he shouted, running toward her.  
-Help me take it away!  
-It’s like stuck! How do you feel?  
The woman struggled to stand, she felt faint and her head was pulsating painfully.  
-Oh gosh, don’t pass out! –he tried to help her to be stand, but she had already lost consciousness. –Stay with me Tosh! Please!

  
The automated door of the Hub opened, Owen entered with Toshiko in his arms, unconscious.  
-For God’s sake, Tosh! –Gwen shouted terrified, rushing toward him.  
-What’s wrong with her, Owen? -Jack soon moved close too.  
-Let me through! –he answered annoyed, quickly carrying Toshiko toward the bed of his medical bay. He made her lay down, then he started frantically fiddling with his things. He tried to hear her heart through his stethoscope, then he connected her to the scanner to monitor her.  
-Owen! –Jack shouted, up from the railing, the doctor raise his gaze to reach his. –Can you give us an explanation? What’s wrong with Toshiko? And what the hell is that thing on her head?  
-That bracelet… it wasn’t a bracelet!  
-What do you mean? –Gwen asked, who meanwhile had joined him, near Tosh.  
-Explain to us, Owen! –Jack continued, in the same scolding tone of voice.  
-We were about to beat feet, when out of the blue, while it was still in her hand, it started going up, then, I dunno why, it stuck itself on her head and she passed out, in my arms. –he concluded, never get distracted from what he was doing.  
In the meantime, Jack went down with Ianto, arrived in time to hear Owen’s explanation.  
-What’s she got, exactly?  
-Is she all right? –Gwen asked, upset.  
-It appears so. –the doctor answered, surprised by his own statement. –She’s basically sleeping.  
-Sleeping? –Ianto began, joining the conversation.  
-Steady pulsation and breath, rapid pupil movement, firm limbs, these all indicate that she’s in the REM phase. And actually she’s also dreaming something pleasing!  
-How can you tell it? –Gwen asked.  
-You don’t have to be a doctor to deduce it. –Owen promptly replied. –She’s… smiling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone!  
> Needless to say I don't own Torchwood and all its characters (unfortunately), they all belong to that ~~cynic~~ lovely man who's Russel T. Davies!  
>  This is my first fanfiction! I'm a huge fan of Torchwood and Doctor Who and I definetely love the couple(?) Tosh/Owen, they're also my favorite characters in Torchwood (cried a lot for their end). My story is set during the season two, at some point between "Fragments" and "Exit Wounds". I chose to use the T rate, but there's a bit of swearing in it (expecially because of Owen!!), mostly in the next chapters.  
> I have to apologize for possible (maybe certain!) mistakes, you know, English is not my first language (I'm Italian) but at least I hope you found this first chapter intriguing enough to keep reading. The story is finished, I've just to post the other chapters, maybe tomorrow. Yes I know, the show is old by now, but I started watching it only a few month ago and I immediately loved it ** (for this I've read a lot of fanfics until I decided to write one on my own), and now, with the Big Finish (!!!!) I hope there's still someone interested in reading about it. Please, I'd love to receive comments, even critisims if it's productive, so let me know if (for now) you like it!  
> P.S. yeah, I know, I love using brackets in notes! XD


	2. Chapter 2

Hesitantly, Toshiko moved close to the entrance of the house, following those who, as she had just learnt, were her children. The interior was even better, comfortable and furnished with taste, her taste. In front of her, there was a majestic stairway with light brown wood steps, like the wooden floor. She had always dreamed a stairway in the entryway of her house. Before her, there was a long hallway, which concluded in a French door that looked out over the backyard. On each side of the aisle there were several rooms, she guessed the presence of a toilet behind the stairs, which was quite predictable, but she was almost certain she knew how it appeared. She felt like a stranger in someone else’s home, but at the same time, without knowing why, everything was familiar and comforting.  
She noticed a little sideboard to her left and she moved closer to it. She skipped a beat seeing the photos laying on it, pent up into delicious wooden frames. One of them showed her with Owen and their kids, smaller than they were at that moment. In another one, there was Owen, wearing an elegant black suit and a bow tie. He was smiling, and beside him, she could see herself wearing a wonderful white dress, the same she had always dreamed since she was a child. They seemed quite cheerful. She felt her chest tight looking at those photos, the day she had always dreamed, which, she knew, would have never happened.  
-Tosh? –Owen had just interrupted her depressing train of thoughts. –How was your day at work? Why did you come home early?  
That question floored her, how the hell could she answer, she didn’t even know where she worked, and something was telling her it was actually not  for Torchwood. She wondered if he was finding the whole situation completely odd as she was.  
-I fell asleep! –she replied, it was probably the most stupid excuse she had ever been able to find.  
-Asleep? –he echoed her, barely trying to hide a chuckle.  
-Yeah, well, I was exhausted, I fell asleep and then was ordered to go home early. –she tried to seem persuasive and apparently she succeeded since his amused look turned in one of his typical smirks, he was patently not changed at all, assumed he was still himself.  
-Well, I see, after last night… -he concluded, starting to move. Yes, he was definitely still the same as ever, she thought, blushing.  
-Owen! –she stopped him.  
-Yeah?  
She put herself near him and she caressed his beard, wondering if it was actually authentic, of course it couldn’t, he was dead, he couldn’t grow a beard anymore. And yet, touching it, it seemed to be genuine, after all, why the hell would he wear a fake beard? Then, under his puzzled gaze, she held his left hand, noticing that the wound on his palm and his broken finger were perfectly healed and that he was wearing a wedding ring too. She couldn’t believe it.  
-You’re alive… -she quietly whispered.  
-I was it, the last time I checked! –he joked, still perplexed. –Tosh sweetheart, are you okay? Maybe you need to rest. –he concluded, putting the back of his wrist on her forehead, to check her body heat.  
-I need to talk to you.  
-Okay, let’s talk! –he spurred her, noticeably confused. –Kids, go and play outside!  
-Does Jack know about this? –Toshiko asked, firmly, once they went to the living room. Needless to say how she liked the furniture, and how well it matched the sofas.  
-Jack? –he answered back, dazed. –Do you mean our neighbour Jack? What should he know?  
-No, Captain Jack Harkness!  
-Captain? Of a ship?  
The woman sat near him on the sofa, sighing, maybe it was the work of an alien, or she was mad. Perhaps she actually needed to chill. Her gaze turned to some photos on the wall above the fireplace. In one in particular where they were together, they were sitting side by side and were holding two beers, it was the same photo she had on her fridge. She stood up and reached it.  
-Maybe I’m just too tired, you know, I had a very strange dream, we worked together and this Jack bloke was our boss.  
-Yeah? -Owen replied, relieved. –And what were we doing?  
-We were going after… valuable and secret artefacts.  
-Um, it seems interesting. –he answered, reaching her.  
-This photo! –she pointed at it. –Do you remember that night? –she asked, curious about what he could say to her.  
-Of course! Christmas 2006, our first kiss!  
-Yeah. –she replied smiling, it was true, leaving a party in the Hub, she had brought the mistletoe. –Can’t you remember where we were? It was, um… -she stopped, hoping he would help her.  
-It’s Josh’s ex flat, if I recall correctly. I insisted on sharing the cab with you and I brought the mistletoe hoping to kiss you.  
-But Owen!  
-I know, you caught me, but I fell in love with you since the very first moment I met you! –he concluded, putting his arms around her waist and kissing her.

* * *

 Owen didn’t step away for even a second from Tosh, he was sitting on a chair near her bed, staring at her. He had made the slab as comfortable as possible. He put a pillow under her head, some covers that could make softer and warmer the frozen metallic table on which she was lying. He had even used a heater to warm up the room, making sure to ask Gwen and Ianto if they found the temperature pleasant enough.  
Nothing had happened, sometimes she moved a finger or an eyebrow, but anything else had changed. Until then. Suddenly he noticed that the rhythm of her heartbeat was accelerating.  
-Guys… Oi! –he promptly shouted, drawing the others’ attention. –C’mon!  
-What’s happened? –Gwen moved quickly down the stairs toward him.  
-Any changes? -Jack asked, reaching her with Ianto.  
-Her beat! It’s increased! –he answered upset, and then returned to look at the monitors, noticing it was back to normal again. –It lasted very little, but it accelerated, not in a worrying way, it seems that also serotonin and oxytocin levels have grown. –he continued, confused, while examining the data from the scanner.  
-Interesting… -Jack observed, with a bit of a smile on his face. –You’ve said that she’s dreaming, haven’t you? Something pleasing, probably something really pleasing!

* * *

 A soon as Owen came off her to catch his breath, he noticed that she was looking at him with dizziness.  
-Wow, my kisses still manage to stun people, that’s brilliant! –he sentenced, satisfied. –I’m making some tea, fancy it? –he continued, making his way out of the room.  
That evening, after dining together as a real family, and after managing to find out her children’s names, Katie and Bryan, Toshiko decided she would take a shower and then go to bed. Apparently, it was her turn to take the kids to school the next day, luckily she also learnt which school. Making her way to the aisle upstairs, she listened to Owen and the children in their room, and she looked out the door.  
-A story? But it’s late! –he complained, jokingly. He was on a chair between the two little beds.  
-Please, daddy!  
-Come on!  
-All right!  
Tosh was looking at them and couldn’t stop a grin, the fact of being married with Owen and having two children with him, a girl and a boy, it certainly wasn’t a novelty, how much she had dreamed it. And then it was actually happening. Never could she have imagined Owen being such a tender and caring father.  
-Well, let’s see it! Once upon a time there was a beautiful princess! She was…  
-In danger? –Katie interrupted him.  
-She had to be saved? –her brother followed her.  
-No-no, none of this! This princess is very brave and she doesn’t need anyone! Well, maybe, a prince.  
-Is the prince who has to be saved? –the girl interrupted him again.  
-Hey! Who’s telling the story, me or you? Do you want to sit down here so I can get comfortable on your beds and listen to you? –he joked, pretending to be offended. The kids laughed, and Tosh too.  
-No! Go on! –they begged him.  
-Well, where was I? Yes, the prince! You should know that he wasn’t exactly a traditional prince, he wasn’t particularly handsome or robust. You can say actually that he remained a frog. –he observed, nodding with conviction. –However he was very clever! –the children laughed again. –Yeah, and also the princess, among other things, was pretty clever too.  
-Did they use to fight the dragons together? –Bryan asked.  
-Of course! Dragons! Well, they weren’t exactly dragons, they were actually horrible monsters from the space!  
-From the space?  
Tosh was taken aback, he was talking about aliens, was it a coincidence?  
-Yeah! And they were ugly-looking bad lads! But only together could they manage to defeat them, thanks to their… cleverness! –he continued, a bit reluctantly. –And also particular special weapons which only they had.  
Tosh kept listening to him, increasingly convinced that it couldn’t be a coincidence.  
-Which weapons? –they immediately asked.  
-Well, weapons with the power of freezing monsters!  
-Didn’t they kill them? –Katie asked.  
-Kill them? No, why would that be? The prince preferred studying them!  
Toshiko wondered what had inspired him telling that story, if he had a fervent imagination, or he was just bad with words as he had already told her.  
-Why?  
-And then? –the kids continued.  
-That’s not fair! You should be asleep at this point!  
-No, please! Go on!  
The woman made her way to her bedroom, it was exactly as she had imagined it just before opening the door, which was happening far too often that day, and she had begun to notice it. She knew that there was a bathroom to her right, and so it was. She caught a bathrobe and reached the shower.  
Physically nothing had changed much, no scars on her belly, she could notice with relief, nor stretch marks, just a soft cellulite, that in any case she already had for few years, and her breast was bigger.  
She didn’t know exactly how to deal with the whole situation, on the one hand she was over the moon, she was married with the man she had been secretly in love with for so long, they had children together, a beautiful house, a good position with his job, as she learnt during the dinner. And yet, she knew it was all wrong, that it was just not meant to be, that the situation was completely odd, but she couldn’t explain herself what was happening.  
Suddenly she heard a knock at the bathroom’s door.  
-Honey, are you there?  
-I’m in the shower! –she quickly answered.  
-Can I come in?  
-I’m naked! –she told without a thought, as if that could prevent Owen from entering. She heard him giggling then opening the door. She mentally thanked the shower’s frosted glass.  
-Don’t worry, I’ll try not to look! –he replied smirking and undoing his shirt. Tosh breathed a huge sigh of relief, hidden by the loud sound of the water. Shortly after she heard the shower’s door opening and soon closing again, and him embracing her from behind. She froze, embarrassed, and instinctively she put her hands on her breast. He moved her hair from her right shoulder and tried to kiss her neck, but she moved him over, turning her head.  
-I don’t think this is a good idea.  
-And why? Besides, we haven’t done it here for a while.  
-The kids!  
-The kids? They’re sleeping, my special magic weapon managed to put them asleep! –he giggled, then he kissed her on her back.  
-No Owen, it’s not fair!  
Trying to cover herself the best she could and not to look at him, she wore her bathrobe, leaving him there, alone and puzzled.  
She made her way to her bed, found a pyjama on the right side and wore it, and then she put herself under the covers, drying her hair with a towel. She felt deeply embarrassed, not so much for the situation itself, but for how odd she had appeared to him, she was his wife at the end.  
Shortly after, Owen came out from the bathroom with a towel around his waist. He looked a bit down in the dumps, silently he sat on the bed and started to put on his pyjama, turning his back to her, which wasn’t that bad, she couldn’t bear to look him in the eyes.  
-What’s happening, Tosh? –he broke his silence. -You’re weird. There’s another man? Don’t you love me anymore, Tosh?  
-No! –she stopped him. –I love you! Of course… I love you! –she repeated, sincerely.  
The man turned to her, and she noticed that instead of the pyjama, he was buttoning up his shirt.  
-So, what’s happening? Tell me it!  
-I told you, I’m tired! Where are you going? –she asked then, noticing he was fully clothed.  
-Just got a call from the hospital, I have to run. It seems you’re safe! –he bitterly smiled at her, before leaving.

* * *

Having noticed Owen sitting near Toshiko and staring at her, Jack decided to go down to see if he was well.  
-How is she? –he asked him, leaning on a cupboard, near the chair he was seated on.  
-Stationary, she doesn’t seem to worsen, nor to get better. I put her on I.V., if she’s in a coma, I can’t foresee when she’ll wake up.  
-Why don’t you go home? Ianto and I will sit with her, if there's any news, you’ll be immediately informed.  
-Home? For doing what? I can’t sleep, Jack, nor chill in any way. I believed we’ve already dealt with that! And then, I think I’m more useful here than at home doing nothing!  
-Ok, message received. –he surrendered, sipping the tea Ianto had made him.  
-It’s my fault. –he claimed, keeping looking at Tosh. –I should never have left her alone a second, I should have imagined that…  
-What? What were you supposed to imagine? It’s not your fault, it’s nobody’s fault! Just that bloody artefact’s!  
-Did you manage to find out what the bloody hell that fucking gizmo is?  
-Not yet.  
-Tosh would’ve already done!  
-Indeed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are! As I promised I'm posting the other chapters of my story! This one is a bit longer, I hope you like it! ^^


	3. Chapter 3

That morning Tosh woke up alone. She wondered if Owen had come home that night and if he had slept with her. She checked the alarm clock, it was half past seven. Only then she came up that she had to hurry up, it was her turn to take the children to school. She had a quick shower and rushed to their room, but it was empty. She went downstairs and found them perfectly ready, having breakfast in the kitchen. She immediately felt relieved.  
-Where’s dad? –she asked them, struggling to seem normal.  
They just shrugged. She sighed, maybe he hadn’t come home at all. Suddenly she heard the front door opening and quickly went to the entrance. Owen had just arrived, she noticed he was wearing a different shirt from the night before under his coat, and realized that, hence, he came home. She smiled.  
-Tosh! –he greeted her, sweetly smiling.  
-Owen, I…  
-No, don’t talk. –he interrupted her. -You know, leaving home early is the only way if you want the best ones. –he continued, getting closer with a hand behind his back.  
-What do you mean? –she asked, confused. Owen smiled at her and brought out a magnificent bouquet of pink lilies. Her favourite flowers.  
-They’re wonderful! –she said, out of breath. Owen would have died a second time rather than giving her flowers, he had told her openly the only time she had hoped he did.  
-Not as much as you! Oh dear, it sounds so predictable! –he concluded, his smile turning into an uncertain look. Toshiko giggled shyly, hearing his compliment, and he noticed it, smiling at her. –What now? What’s that clumsy schoolgirl look? –he asked her, giggling in turn.  
-It’s just that, I’ll never get used to your attentions! –she answered, grabbing the flowers. He smiled again.  
-You’d better!  
-You shouldn’t have, really!  
-For whatever reason you resent me, I beg your pardon! Forgive me! –Tosh was looking at him, astonished, she actually wasn’t used to hearing excuses from him, especially, so explicitly and politely.  
-I don’t resent you, Owen! It’s all right, seriously! –she told him, caressing his face. He placed a hand on hers, then he tightened her and kissed her.

After she took the kids to school, Tosh went to work, or at least the place flagged as it by her car’s GPS. It was a big tech firm, she wasn’t surprised, she adored computers and certainly, if there hadn’t been any Torchwood, she still would have dealt with them.  
Before she got off her car, she looked for some information about the place and learnt that she herself was the Vice President of the Company. She was someone of consequence, not the most important one, but still was.  
She didn’t wonder about that, she hated to be too exposed, and actually she had never been too aspiring about her future, she had always wanted to deal with what she loved, computers.  
Once inside she greeted everyone, quickly looked for the word “Offices” on a map at the entrance, entered in the lift and made her way to the third floor. Without thinking a moment, she immediately managed to find out her office, at this point she was acquainted with the situation.  
It was sober, but lovely, she reached her desk and searched for the word “Torchwood” on the computer, making sure to blur her position. She was astonished, there wasn’t anything. Of course, it was a confidential organization, but the fact that neither her herself could find anything was disturbing. Then, she looked for Jack Harkness, but anything again. She wondered if that could make sense, but suddenly, the telephone on her desk rung, rousing her. She turned on the speakerphone and answered.  
-Hello?  
-Mrs. Harper? –she smiled, hearing her called that way.  
-Yes?  
-There is a call for you from your mother. Do you accept it? –her heart failed for a moment. Her mother? She didn’t even know if she was still alive, it had been a while since the last time she had heard from her.  
-Su-sure.  
She heard a beep and then silence.  
-Mum? –she asked in Japanese, feeling her heart in her ears.  
-Hi my baby!  
Hearing those words, spoken by her voice, caused her a pit in her stomach. She started crying silently.  
-Is it all right, darling?  
-Yes! I’m fine, mum.  
-Good! I was thinking, I could come over with your father and then take the children to the park this afternoon, of course only after they will have finished their homework. You and Owen will be at work so, since they have the spare afternoon today… if that’s okay with you!  
-Dad… -she thought out loud. She couldn’t believe it, he was alive.  
-Yes, your father and me. Is it ok?  
-Yes, of course!  
-Well, see you later little darling.  
-See you, mum! –she couldn’t stop using continuously that word.

* * *

Owen moved for some minutes to find a cover for Tosh. That morning Gwen had undressed her and put one of her nightgowns on her, after washing her a bit. He had let her on her own, despite the fact that he was dead and couldn’t feel a thing in that way anymore, he would be embarrassed to see her naked.  
When he came back to her with the cover, he was stunned to see Toshiko crying in her sleep. He laid the cover and rushed to look at her closer. She seemed happy, and yet she was crying, he wondered what she was dreaming and if it was her dream to influence her physical reactions. He took a paper handkerchief, sat close to her and wiped her tears away.  
-Tosh –he whispered to her. –Forgive me, for everything. I’ve been an arse to you, all this time. And now I don’t even know what’s happening to you, and it’s all my fault. –he continued, tightening the handkerchief he’d used just before. –Please, wake up. –he murmured in her ear. –Wake up! –he shouted then. He stood up and took her by the shoulders, trying to shake her. –Wake up, Tosh! –he shouted again, louder. Ianto heard him, went down and stopped him, trying to divide him from Toshiko.  
-Stop it, Owen! You hurt her!  
-Why the fucking hell doesn’t she wake up? –he continued, shouting and then he kicked hard the chair, which fell over badly.  
-Calm down! You’re not helping her by doing this!  
-So, what?  
-Jack and Gwen are doing their best to find out about that thing she has on her head and how to remove it. You’ve only to take care of her. –Ianto tried to convince him.  
-She doesn’t even know she’s lying on a fucking slab, she cried just now, only God knows what for, I’ve no idea what the bloody hell that thing is and if it could kill her, I don’t know what to do to help her and you’re telling me to calm down? –he concluded, yelling again.  
-Tosh would be happy to know what you’re already doing for her. –Owen seemed quieter and Ianto put back the chair. –Do you want me to spell you? So you can…-  
-No way! –he replied, steadfast. He returned to sit near Tosh and crossed his arms, making it clear that he didn’t want to leave.  
Ianto smiled looking at him. Even Owen could be tender, in his own way.

* * *

Toshiko was still sitting at her desk, and was thinking that whatever was happening to her, it was wonderful. Everything was perfect. While wiping her tears away, she suddenly noticed an inscription appearing on her monitor, it said “WAKE UP, TOSH!”. She was puzzled and didn’t manage to understand its meaning. She didn’t even have time to think about it that it soon vanished. Immediately she started to fiddle with her computer, trying to figure out what and from it could have been, but she didn’t see much evidence.  
It was distinctly a message meant for her, hence it was from someone who knew her.  
She stood up and looked out the window behind her desk. From there, she could see the Roald Dahl Plass and the fountain that triumphed over there. Immediately she took her things and left the building.  
-I’ll be right back! –she told a colleague, who was looking at her confused.  
She reached on foot the great Water Tower and put herself on the invisible lift, which led into the Hub, but nothing happened. Then she rushed to the tourist information office, but the door was locked.  
She felt something crushing in her heart, it was her perfect world, and so why the hell didn’t Torchwood seem to exist? Maybe also aliens didn’t exist? If her brain created all those things, maybe it meant that she wished she hadn’t ever been acquainted with anything related to the rift, the aliens and Torchwood?  
Back home from work and the supermarket, that afternoon, Tosh noticed another car parked near Owen’s one. She got off hers with her groceries and observed it. It was an old red Rolls-Royce Carmague, the same one which his father used to drive, when she was a child. She skipped a beat and smiled, her parents were there.  
She walked into the house, left the groceries in the kitchen and looked out the living room, they were on the sofas with Owen and the kids, they were drinking tea and laughing together.  
-Mum! Dad! –she shouted in Japanese, rushing to embrace them, with tears streaming down her face.  
-Darling! –her father answered in English, making sure to be understood also by Owen and the children, hugging her in turn. –It seems you haven’t seen us for years!  
Tosh thought just how true that was and tightened them stronger, they were exactly as she remembered. Owen was looking at her, and his smile turned into a worried look. He thought to leave them alone and left the room.

  
That evening she waved them with another strong hug. They had had dinner together as a real family and Owen seemed to be again in a good mood, at least so she thought.  
Her father and Owen offered to clean up before they left, hence Tosh didn’t have much on. After saying good night to her children, she made her way to bed. A bit later, he reached her, and after getting undressed, he laid down near her and tried to kiss her. She avoided him again. She wanted to make love with him more than anything, but for some reason she felt guilty and refused him. And that made her feel guilty too.  
-I’m not blind, Tosh. –the man stated, without even looking at her. –Nor stupid. I know there’s something wrong with us, I just want to know what! It’s me, isn’t it?  
-Absolutely not!  
How she wanted to explain to him everything. About Torchwood, the rift, the aliens, about how she loved him even though he considered her merely a friend, and about how weird that situation was, with them married together even parents of two children and that, just by coincidence, everything was exactly like she had always dreamed. He would have said she was mad, and probably he still believed that.  
-You’re acting weird, Tosh. You’re distant to our children…-  
-No! It’s not true!  
-You’re distant to me, you act as you’ve seen your parents back from the afterlife, you refuse to make love with me!  
-Owen…  
-What the bloody hell is wrong with you, Tosh? –he shouted, finally looking at her.  
That wasn’t the first time for him to yell at her, he had felt angry with her for even more pointless reasons than that and, by then, she had learnt to put up with it, but those words hurt her.  
-I’d better go and sleep on the sofa. –she replied, blankly.  
-No Tosh, forgive me. I’ll sleep on the sofa. Just stay here. –he answered quietly.  
He pulled out a cover from the closet and took his pillow, before looking at her again and leaving the room.  
Tosh started crying. She was living her dream and yet she didn’t know how to deal with it. She was ruining everything. Her gaze turned to her wedding ring. She pulled it out and observed it. Inside it there was an inscription, “Owen and Toshiko. 30/06/07.” She held it and closed her eyes, keeping crying, then she wore it again. She just sat there for a bit, before she decided. Whatever, it was what she wanted for years, why refuse it? She thought, weeping her tears away. She got out of bed and went downstairs.  
-Tosh. –Owen whispered, while she laid on the sofa above him, and kissed him. She wouldn’t have forgotten that night for all the world.  
-Do you remember our wedding? –he asked, later. They were naked on the sofa, covered only by some clothes. She was lying on his chest, while he was caressing her hair.  
Tosh remained in silence for a moment without knowing what to say, then suddenly she had a sort of a flash.  
-It was raining. –she said, and a memory with them who quickly were leaving a church covered by the guests’ umbrellas, who were throwing rice to them, suddenly came up in her mind.  
-Yeah. –he answered, smiling. –You were so worried about your dress, your makeup and your hair! –he giggled. –But actually, you were stunning! You really are stunning, Tosh! –he continued, hanging out a bit to kiss her hair. –The best thing that’s ever happened to me.  
Toshiko couldn’t stop a tear, she turned prone above him, and kissed him.  
-I love you, Tosh  
-I love you too.  
-And now, how about going back to bed and discuss this further? –he continued, showing her one of his charming smirks.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here the third chapter ^^  
> The matters of the lilies as Tosh's favorite flowers and her father's car are obviously totatally fictional, while, as you noticed, I tried to make the Owen from the dream far more polite and sympathetic than the original! I hope everyone's in character! Enjoy it :D


	4. Chapter 4

Gwen went to the Hub very soon that morning, the matter of Tosh was keeping her up nights. Even Rhys had proved understanding and sincerely worried about Toshiko, and she appreciated that.  
As soon as she arrived, she looked out the medical bay, there, as she had expected, there was Owen, he was bending over her and was holding her hands.  
-What’s up? –she asked him, going down the stairs toward his lab.  
-What do you think? –he replied ironically, getting up and going back to check the monitors.  
-You’ve never gone out from this room since yesterday evening, haven’t you?  
-Twice, to take her something to warm her up.  
Gwen smiled, although being still worried about him.  
-You look a mess, by the way. –she said, trying to stay gentle.  
-I’m dead, Gwen.  
-Jack told me you feel responsible for this. –she said, looking at Tosh and sitting close to her, where he was earlier.  
He didn’t answer, but finally turned to her and just shrugged.  
-Owen…  
-I know. –he interrupted her, to avoid another similar argument he had already had with Jack. –I couldn’t imagine… Tosh is adult and responsible for herself… It’s been just an unfortunate circumstance and bla-bla-bla…  
Gwen didn’t know how to reply and started looking at Tosh while was sleeping.  
-She seems so peaceful. –she sighed. Owen turned his gaze away, thinking about the other two times he had had to wipe her tears away. –Like a fairy tale princess. Have you tried to kiss her? –then she asked him, seriously.  
-Don’t be ridiculous! –he replied, with a scornful look.  
Gwen sighed again. She kissed her forehead and left the room, making her way to her workstation.  
Shortly later, once also Jack and Ianto had got up, and Gwen had washed Tosh, Owen was still there, standing right next the monitors, and trying to think about whatever would have made her wake up.  
-Owen.  
He quickly turned to her, she had just pronounced his name, was she awake? He looked at her, she was still sleeping, so why had she just done it?  
-Tosh, I’m here. Can you hear me? –he whispered, hoping that she would open her eyes and answer. –Tosh!  
-Found it! –Gwen suddenly shouted, making him wince.  
-Have you figured out what is it? –Ianto asked, reaching her with the other two ones.  
-Right! –she answered enthusiastic. –It’ a very particular device, it connects with the closer one and causes a cataleptic fit.  
-We were in an alley and probably there was some kind of animal, which was carrying it around, why didn’t it work with it? –Owen interrupted her.  
-It needs a highly developed brain to work and strong brainwaves, like human ones.  
-And what is it doing to her? –Jack immediately asked.  
-According to what I’ve found, it’s apparently harmless. It creates in his victim’s brain a reality based on her dreams and desires. Basically, now Tosh is living in an ideal world that’s perfect for her.  
-Interesting. –Jack stated, nodding. –Is there a way to bring her back to our world?  
-Erm… let me see… -Gwen replied, back to check her computer. –Apparently, there isn’t. –she concluded, clouded.  
Jack seemed to reflect on it, and everyone turned to him, waiting for him to share with them what he was thinking.  
-Maybe, something can be done. What does usually happen when we’re within a dream we don’t like, a nightmare?  
-We try to wake up! –Gwen promptly answered.  
-Owen?  
-I’m not an expert at this, but basically, feeling in danger, our brain make us realize what we’re living through is just a figment of our imagination and just the mere fact of that forces us to wake up.  
-Exactly, and all we have to do is to make that signal arrive at her brain.  
-But how? –Gwen asked, in confusion.  
-One of us has to join her dream and convince her that what she’s experiencing isn’t real and this should wake her up, obviously for this person won’t be a problem to come back.  
-Who of us will do it? –Ianto asked.  
-Well, I was thinking to volunteer. –Jack promptly replied. –But it’s necessary for whoever will meddle with her dream, to be already part of it, and I’m not sure to be present in her ideal world. –he concluded.  
-I’ll do it. –Owen offered.  
-But you’re dead! –Gwen stated right away, receiving a dirty look from him. –Sorry, but you can’t sleep, nor dream.  
-You’ve talked about brainwaves, haven’t you? Well, I still have them, they’re the only thing that keeps me alive, if you can call it that. I can do it! –he continued then, turning to Jack.  
-He’s right. –he said to the others, looking at Owen. –But, how can you be certain she’s dreaming you? –he asked him then, not much convinced. Everyone there knew how Tosh loved Owen.  
-She pronounced my name. A little while ago, I heard her. Whatever she’s dreaming, I’m in it too.  
-It’s ok. –Jack concluded. –We’ll connect some electrodes on your head, and on the device had put Toshiko asleep. I hope we will.  
Owen was made to sit near Toshiko, as Jack had told them, two electrodes were connected on his temples and on the device, near hers.  
-Will I be able to communicate with you, in some ways?  
-It’s unlikely. Can you feel anything? –Jack asked then.  
-Nothing. –Owen replied, resigned.  
Suddenly they noticed the red stone line shining and a strange energy crossed the cables to Owen’s head, who immediately lost consciousness.

* * *

Suddenly Owen woke up and looked around him, confused. He was sitting at a desk in what it seemed to be a medical office. He was wearing a white coat and a pair of glasses, and on his chest there was a medical ID card that said “Dr. Owen Harper”, he was glad to find that at least his profession was the same. Then, suddenly, his gaze turned to a photo laying on his desk, he immediately grabbed it and looked at it, taken aback. It showed him and Tosh with two little children in a garden, they were smiling and seemed to be happy. He also noticed he was wearing a wedding ring and that his broken finger was completely healed, even the cut on his palm. Was he married with Tosh? Was it that the perfect world she had created for her? On a second thought, he could have imagined it.  
-Oh… -he swallowed deeply, but was suddenly awaken by someone who was knocking on the door.  
-Doctor Harper? –he heard.  
-Come in, please.  
A man on his fifties got through the door. He didn’t recognize him, and actually he had never seen him before.  
-I brought you the daily schedule with your medical appointment and examinations.  
Owen got up and leant out a little to grab it, then took one look at it. He was stunned to learn it was a set of clean sheets of paper.  
-Is it a joke? –he asked, looking at the other speaker, puzzled.  
-Pardon?  
-What exactly do we do here?  
-Well, the things every doctor does! Examinations, surgery, we nurse unhealthy people!  
-Of course. –Owen nodded, forcing a polite smile. He was in Tosh’s dream, and obviously he wasn’t sure how much accurate was her knowledge of hospitals and medicine in general.  
-Allow me to walk you to the exit. –he continued, holding him gently by the shoulders and accompanying him out the door. There he saw a rather good-looking nurse go by, who was looking at them in confusion, he made her one of his smirks and made his way to the toilets.  
As soon as he walked by the mirror, he almost got spooked. He was wearing a beard, not very long, but evident. He had never wanted to grow a beard, it didn’t even grow very heavy and it made him look older. He took off his glasses and rubbed his chin, everything was really absurd.  
He got back to his office and sat at his desk. He grabbed again the sheets he received earlier and started thinking. He had to find Tosh as soon as possible and convince her to wake up. He accidentally cut himself with the paper. What an idiot! He thought, then he noticed he was weakly bleeding. He sucked from his finger the tiny droplet with his lips, and could taste the bitter metallic blood. Only then he actually realized he was alive and he could feel everything once again. He immediately thought to check the wound on his chest. He opened his coat and part of his shirt, and was delightedly surprised to notice there was no mark, nor a scar. Nothing at all.  
-Interesting. –he murmured, and buttoned up his shirt.  
A little later, he heard someone knocking at the door again. He prayed it wasn’t the same bloke from earlier, he didn’t like him at all.  
-Come in! –he repeated, annoyed.  
The beautiful nurse he had seen out his office entered the room.  
-Good morning, doctor Harper! –she greeted him, with a flirting smile.  
-My prayers have been answered! –he murmured to himself, returning the smile. –Good morning!  
-I brought you Mr. Smith’s C.T. results.  
-Of course, let me see them, please. –he answered, keeping smiling at her.  
The woman reached him, handed the response to him, and she leant on his desk, near him, crossing her legs. Owen was not surprised to learn that also those sheets were completely clean.  
-Very interesting, thank you. –he said, sighing, placing it on his desk, resignedly. Then he turned to her, more specifically, to her bare thighs, and he couldn’t help but notice how they were sexy.  
After a long time and with great pleasure, he noticed he was getting an erection.  
-Let me know, doctor Harper, if you need anything else.  
-God, yes. –he answered, grabbing her wrist, before she could leave.  
Without further ado, the attractive nurse sat on his thighs and started kissing him. He had missed it so much, he thought. Besides, what was wrong with giving himself a distraction? Yet, he had all the time to find Tosh, and he was certain she was well. Meanwhile the woman had started unbuttoning his shirt and was kissing his chest, but Owen’s gaze turned to the photo and he felt suddenly guilty. Why was it that he had to ruin everything, even in Tosh’s perfect world?  
-I want you…  
-Me too. –she interrupted him, opening his belt.  
-…out of here! –he concluded, trying to push her away.  
-Sorry? –she stated, confused.  
-Now!  
-Why do you say that? I’ve noticed how you look at me!  
-I’m a married man… Alice. –he quickly answered, looking at her name on her ID card.  
-So what? –she replied, like she couldn’t realize.  
-Get out of here! Otherwise, I’ll tell about your conduct to the head physician!  
The woman giggled, amused.  
-You are the head physician, doctor Harper!  
-Wow… Seriously? –she nodded, keeping laughing. –Well then, even more so, go away!  
The nurse got up, disappointed, and he, composing himself, went to the door with her and watched her walk away.  
-I’m such a twat! –he murmured to himself. Then looked at the back of his door and read “Dr, Owen Harper, head physician in Neurosurgery and General Medicine”. He smiled.  
-Thanks Tosh! –he murmured to himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, here the fourth chapter! I know, maybe the way in which Gwen finds out how the alien device works is a bit stupid, but without the genius of Tosh I decided this! Hope you like it ^^


	5. Chapter 5

Once concluded his absurd shift at the hospital, Owen made his way to home, following the address flagged from the GPS of the flashy silver SUV he had learnt to be his car.  
The outside of the house was just enchanting, that rustic style he guessed that had to fascinate Tosh.  
He opened the front door, hoping he could find her inside. He hesitated a moment on the threshold, looking around with bated breath, and a wolf-whistle came spontaneously. That was definitely the elegant Tosh’s style.  
-I’m home! –he shouted then, waiting curiously for a reply. He hadn’t to wait too long before seeing two children rushing down the stairs in front of him.  
-Daddy! –they shouted together.  
Owen shivered and, trying to look happy, he bent down and opened his arms to embrace them.  
-My kids! –he told them, without having any idea how to call them. –Let me look at you!  
The boy looked like Tosh, he was maybe six, while her, he almost got spooked to notice how she looked like him, same eyes and nose, he thought she was about nine or ten.  
-Owen? I’m in the kitchen! –Tosh’s voice woke him up. He stood up and came in a room to his left, where he thought it was from.  
A delicious smell made his nostrils tremble, he breathed it deeply, he missed food so much, among other things. She was cooking, her back on him, and was singing something, she seemed cheerful. She immediately turned to him and smiled, reaching him with a spoon.  
-Tell me if you like it. –she said, and put it near his mouth.  
-Excellent! –he smiled.  
Tosh immediately placed the spoon on the shelf of the kitchen island near her, and she kissed him, sneaking up on him.  
-How was your day at work, love? –she asked him, grinning.  
-Tosh, it’s me, Owen! –he said, embarrassed.  
-I know who you are, honey! –she replied, giggling.  
-No-no, Tosh. It’s actually me.  
-Oh…  
Tosh’s grin suddenly turned into a patently embarrassed look, and she immediately broke away from him.  
-I can… I can explain everything. –she told him, without looking at him.  
-No, there’s no need. I know, we’re married and it seems we have children together. I was just wondering…  
-What? –she quickly replied.  
-Do you really prefer me with a beard? –he asked with a disgusted look, which made her laugh.  
-How did you manage to… -she said then, interrupting herself. She wasn’t sure how to describe the situation in which she was stuck.  
-Do you remember how you went here? –he asked her.  
-No, I don’t. I woke up in a cab which brought me here in this house and I learnt we’re married and we’ve got two children. The really absurd fact is that Torchwood doesn’t exist in this dimension, if you can call it that, nor do Jack and the others exist. We, for example, met at a party in 2006, and we got married a year later, now we’re in 2016.  
-Hence we’re older! Well then, I can justify my beard… -Owen stated, rubbing it involuntarily. -No, actually no. I can’t justify it at all! –he concluded, with a disgusted voice. Tosh laughed. –And yet, I’m sure you didn’t age a day! –he stated then, she blushed hearing his compliment. -Seriously, you haven’t changed at all! Apart from… -he interrupted himself a bit embarrassed, glancing at her breast. Tosh felt embarrassed in turn. –I mean, not that I ever noticed… Oh c’mon Tosh, you know me, how could I never have noticed?  
-It’s my dream! –she interrupted him, clearly blushed. –My brain changed whatever’s convenient for me, I think, and yet, apparently I’ve had two children!  
-Oh… well… that makes sense! And, have you, by chance, thought also about… -he continued, turning to his groin. –Not that I need it, of course!  
-Owen! –she cried out, uneasily. –Of course, not! –she continued, her gaze still on her feet.  
-Anyway… Sorry to interrupt your talk with the pavement, you’re telling you don’t remember us looking for an alien artefact. Sort of a bracelet, which turned huge and stuck on your head?  
Tosh seemed to remember, how could she had forgotten such an important fact like that?  
-Of course, now I remember. But you?  
-You've been asleep in my lab for three days. This morning Gwen managed to find out how that device on your head is working.  
-Seriously? Well done! –Tosh observed, admired.  
-Indeed, according to what she found, it isn’t dangerous, actually sort of fun for aliens. You fall asleep and voilà! You wind up in a perfect world, all of your most secret desires. –he concluded smirking, noticing embarrassment on Tosh’s face. –Jack had a breakthrough, he thought there was just need for someone already in your dream, to meddle with it and explain you this is just your imagination and that it’s time for you to wake up!  
-And so… how did you know you were in my dream?  
-You called my name. This morning, it was about seven.  
Tosh violently blushed thinking about her and Owen that morning, naked with their arms around each other, about the way in which he had woken her up, and her who, sighing, had called his name.  
-It was you all? Yesterday, on my computer at work, at about eleven an inscription appeared on the monitor, it said “wake up, Tosh!” in capitals. –she tried to change the subject.  
Owen meditated on it for a moment and suddenly thought about the moment in which he had tried to wake her up shaking her and shouting her name.  
-Erm… it’s likely. –he replied, trying to hide his embarrassment.  
The embarrassing silence was interrupted by the girl who meanwhile entered the room.  
-Mummy? Daddy? Can I go to Jane’s house this afternoon? We’ll do our homework together! Please! –she asked them, with a begging voice. They looked at her.  
-Tosh?  
-Of course, darling! I’ll take you after lunch! –the woman replied.  
-Yeah! –the girl shouted, enthusiastic. –Thanks, thanks, thanks! –she concluded, before running away.  
-I don’t even know who this Jane is. –she told Owen then, meditating.  
-Well, I don’t think she could have sketchy blokes as friends at her age! –he joked, making her laugh. –By the way, what are their names?  
-Whose names? –she asked in turn, confused.  
-Our lovely children’s!  
-Oh, right! Katie and Bryan. Now sorry, I was cooking, I don’t want to set the kitchen on fire! –Toshiko concluded, getting back to the stoves.  
Owen felt a pit in his stomach, hearing the name Katie, he wondered how Tosh thought to call her daughter with that name.  
-Owen. –she roused him. -Now you’re here, and told me this isn’t real, why are we still in my dream?  
He looked at her and meditated a moment. Actually, it didn’t even occur to him.  
-I don’t know. Maybe you don’t really want it. I mean, wake up.  
Toshiko froze for an instant, Owen was right, that was the life she dreamed, she actually didn’t want to come back. There, there was everything she desired.  
-So why are you still here?  
-It’s different for me! –he quickly replied, leaning against the door frame. –I’m connected to you, maybe I can’t wake up ‘till you do it. Or maybe… -he stopped.  
-Maybe?  
-Nothing! –he promptly replied, that life was probably beginning to attract him. –I’m starving! –he said then, completely changing the subject. –I haven’t eaten for weeks, literally.  
-Lunch will be ready in a half hour, I think. -Tosh replied.  
Owen got close the island of the kitchen where a metal box was laying on and opened it.  
-Oh! A biscuit tin with real biscuits in it! This is definitely a satisfaction! –he uttered grabbing one. –Unless… Do you think they’re real biscuits? –he asked her, cautiously examining the one in his hand.  
-Of course they are! You made them!  
-Uh, didn’t know I can make biscuits, I can barely make a toast without burning it!  
-Not you, I mean…  
-The perfect version of me, I know. –he interrupted her, tasting it. –Oh Jesus, it’s unbelievable, it’s actually a biscuit!  
-Yes! –she replied. –What else would it be?  
-And it’s so good! Goodness, I think I could get another erection!  
-Another? –Tosh immediately asked.  
-Forget it, don’t mind me. Anyway, getting hard for a biscuit, how pathetic I’ve become?

* * *

It had been several hours since Owen was connected to that alien device with Tosh, and they didn’t wake up yet. Jack, Gwen and Ianto were really troubled.  
-He must have found her and told her everything by now! –Gwen stated.  
She was at her workstation, her face right up against the sofa on which the men were sitting, thoughtful. Sometimes one of them stood up to take a look downstairs, toward the medical bay, but nothing had changed.  
-Now that even Owen is there. –Ianto began. –How can we make sure they’re well?  
-I promise you they’ll wake up, it’s just a matter of time! –Jack tried to convince them, but actually, even he was losing hope.  
-What if we’re wrong? And if he didn’t come in Tosh’s dream, but he created another one on his own? We’d be back to square one! –Gwen asked, dejected  
-This is impossible! –Jack stated, firmly. They could sense angry in his voice.  
-How do you know that? –the woman questioned, she was about to cry.  
-I know it because Owen is aware of what he’s in for! And even if it was, he would know how to rouse! He’s certainly with her, maybe they just encountered some… problems. –he concluded, thoughtful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fifth chapter is posted! I think i'll finsh post all the story by this evening. Let me know if you like it! ^^


	6. Chapter 6

-I’ll be back soon! –Toshiko yelled, holding Katie’s hand, they were about to leave the house.  
-Tosh? –Owen called her, getting close to the entrance, he was still drying a dish with a tea cloth. –We need to talk, later.  
-Of course. –she replied, clouding. She already knew what he had to tell her. That it wasn’t the reality. That she had to wake up. That the others were worried about her. But she didn’t care. Of course, if Owen’s presence depended on her, she couldn’t’ keep him prisoner in a world he didn’t want. She wondered why the hell he had chosen to save her.  
She tried to avoid him all day, she went home late hoping he was already at the hospital and so it was. She was able to see him only at dinner which, with the children, passed rather calmly. They stayed together even when their children begged him, against his will, to tell them another one of his engaging stories about the monsters from the space. He chose to tell them about that time when some killer fairies who killed people suffocating them with petals, even kidnapped and kept with themselves a little girl, who they were protecting. Of course, he obviously omitted some hairy detail, which was a bit complicated because, the whole event was rather hairy in itself. And yet, after all, he succeeded and made the kids laugh.  
-I’m such a terrible father. –he stated then, once they went to their bedroom. They were still, without exactly knowing what to do, he was leant on a dresser, she was near the entrance.  
-What do you say? You’re doing perfectly well! –she giggled. –Your bedtime story was just…  
-Shocking! –he finished her sentence.  
-Actually, I was about to say eccentric, but even shocking fits rather well! –they laughed together.  
-So, this is how it would be. –Owen said then. –I mean. If we worked after that proverbial date which never happened. If I weren’t dead. We would have married, have two gorgeous children together, and we would have lived in this enchanting house with a good job. So, we would have left Torchwood, do you think?  
-Owen! –she interrupted him, she had noticed a scolding voice in his words. –Not necessarily. This is just my mind having fun wandering and dreaming. Perhaps, even if you were alive, it wouldn’t have happened anything between us. Almost surely, indeed. –she concluded, clearly clouded.  
Owen felt guilty, unintentionally he hurt her once another. He realized he was particularly good at it.  
-The name Bryan. –he asked then, deliberately changing the subject. –Where does it come from? Why is our son so-called? –he continued, finding odd his own words.  
-Well, I’ve ever loved this name. It was my first boyfriend’s. –she answered, blushing.  
-Oh. –Owen looked at her, taken aback. –And is this a good idea to call your son after one of your ex boyfriends? –he asked her, chuckling and clearly teasing her.  
-And Katie? –she inquired, suddenly. –I’ve no idea where it’s from.  
Owen froze and abruptly clouded. Yes, his Katie. He was the last person on earth who could have something to say about that.  
-A very important woman in my life. I’m just wondering how you know her name.  
-Well, maybe I’ve heard it from you once.  
Perhaps one of those countless times he, drunk, had unloaded it on her, he thought. In that moment it occurred to him that she had always been close to him.  
-Tosh. –he said then, returning to the issue of that afternoon. –You’re aware that this is completely absurd, aren’t you? –he asked, trying to be gentle.  
-I am, obviously.  
She lowered her eyes, she knew exactly where that was going.  
-So, you know that it’s time to go back to your life. This doesn’t make any sense. It can’t make sense! Out there… -he continued, meaning their real lives. -…the others would be worried. They would think… actually I have no idea about what they would think, but, they’re waiting for me to bring you back.  
-It’s out of my hands, Owen! I can’t do anything, I don’t want to come back! My heart doesn’t. –she realized she was crying, and she immediately wiped her tears away, embarrassed.  
Owen got closer to her and gently grabbed her shoulders.  
-I haven’t got anything to lose staying here. There’s nothing out there worth coming back. –she told him, looking at him and keeping crying. Even Owen could feel his eyes becoming a little glassy. –It’s not just for you! My parents, yesterday I talked with them, with my father, who’s dead for years! Don’t you understand that whatever I want is here? –she shouted. –Why? Why do you want to take it away from me?  
He instinctively embraced her, she bared herself to him, and was so helpless and scared.  
-Tosh, I’m sorry. –he told her, aware to be the cause of her state.  
-Do you want me to sleep downstairs? –she asked him then, once they had composed themselves and she had wiped her tears.  
-No, don’t worry. I’ll sleep on the sofa, if you don’t mind. –he replied.  
-It’s ok, if you want. I wouldn’t mind otherwise… if you wanted to stay.  
-Me neither, I mean, if you want it.  
The atmosphere turned to be rather awkward. Owen went to the right side of the bed.  
-I sleep on that side. -Tosh stopped him.  
-Yes, as you want. –he replied, reaching the other side and sitting on it, while Tosh pulled out her pyjama and went to the bathroom.  
-Tosh. –he called her, once they had gone to bed.  
-Yeah?  
Owen turned to her, with an almost serious look.  
-I was wondering. Did you shag him? I mean, the other me. –he asked, glibly.  
Toshiko blushed, without knowing what to say.  
-What sort of question is that?  
-Come on! I deserve to know!  
-Er… -she swallowed deeply. –Well… yes. Once. Last night. Actually, it was more than once. –she corrected herself, wondering where she got the courage to answer him.  
Owen started giggling.  
-I’m sorry. –she told him, feeling terribly guilty.  
-Oh Tosh, how could you? I feel violated! –he continued, teasing her. She grabbed a pillow and threw at him, offended.  
-And how was it? –he insisted, curious.  
-Owen! –she scolded him, patently embarrassed. She sighed. –Fantastic. –she replied, resigned.  
-Good. Glad to have satisfied your expectations, Mrs. Harper! –he joked, with a pleased smirk on his face.  
She rolled her eyes and eventually started laughing with him.  
-Tosh.  
-What else? –she asked, giggling, but then she noticed that he was looking at her earnestly, and knowing his intentions, she turned serious too.  
Owen had wanted to feel alive again so much, and now that so he was one more time, somehow, and even without knowing for how long, he didn’t know exactly how to deal with her, aware about the fact she loved him, sincerely. He was almost certain she wouldn’t refuse him. She wanted him for so long, and by the way her altruistic nature would understand him, alive again after all that time. How could she refuse him? But he wasn’t that bastard, not after learning about her feelings for him. He didn’t want to take advantage of the situation like that.  
-Nothing. –he finished, looking away from her, who was in suspense. –Look, I was wondering… -he hesitated for a moment. –What’s about me that attracts you so much, Tosh? Yes, by now I know how you’re particularly impressed with charity cases and creepy things, but… -he stopped again, noticing she was laughing, so he smiled at her. -…why me?  
Tosh looked at him thoughtfully, trying to find an answer. In fact, she had been tried for years, and she hadn’t managed to find a proper one yet.  
-Actually, I have no idea. I always wonder the same.  
-That’s definitely a compliment, thanks Tosh! –he mocked her. She laughed again, why was it that he always remained earnest just for bare instants?  
-Maybe, it’s something in your eyes… -she continued. –Your smile… your voice… or maybe your brilliant mind. –he smiled smugly, then started giggling. –I don’t know. When we first met I saw something in you. You were so vulnerable. –she looked into his eyes. –And angry. Do you believe in love at first sight, Owen?  
-Not exactly, but I believe in scorn at first sight! –they both laughed.  
-Well, I think this happened to me. –she continued. –I think that when I find out the actual reason, everything will end. –she sighed. –And now I’m really embarrassed thanks to you, just so you know! –she joked.  
-Tosh, this whole thing is…  
-I know, pathetic! –she interrupted him, looking down.  
-…Kind! –Toshiko looked at him as he had just sworn, not that it was completely unusual. –Look, I think I can tell you are one of the few people who actually has got me. You’ve managed to penetrate into this fucking armour I’ve made and you saw me, truly. -he told her, looking down at his own hands, if she hadn’t known him any better, Tosh would have thought he was embarrassed.  
She trembled, hearing those words, then smiled and he returned. It was the most beautiful thing he had ever told her. She placed a hand on his shoulder, conscious that this time he could really feel it and, keeping looking at each other, they both got closer. But he felt the same sense of guilty from earlier, and immediately drew back, looking away.  
-I’m sorry, Owen. You’re stuck inside this odd world against your will only because of my selfishness.  
-Tosh, don’t say that.  
-Let me finish. Obviously I know you’d never have wanted anything like this, I’ve always known it, for this reason I’ve never told you. –Owen realized she was talking about her feelings for him. –And now you’re dead and everything seems to have complicated, just when you know it, everything makes even less sense. I don’t have a switch, Owen. I can’t end this only because you don’t want it or you’re dead. Unfortunately. –she added, looking at him in the eyes, then lowering her gaze.  
He turned to her and caressed her face, before getting closer and kissing her, while she was freezing, astonished, but immediately kissed him back. He laid gently above her and, keeping kissing her, he helped her undress. They both wanted it, but for different reasons, and both thought they were selfish for that, but actually, at that moment, they didn’t care.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, it's almost finished! Some parts here are a bit sad, but at least in her dream I wanted to give them a chance! Hope you enjoyed it! ^^


	7. Chapter 7

When Owen woke up the next morning, he was alone. He reached the bathroom and pulled out a tin of shaving cream and a new razor from the cabinet. He grabbed a bit of cream and he was about to rub it on his cheeks, but, while looking at his reflected face in the mirror, he stopped. Suddenly he decided that, after all, he wasn’t that bad, and could get used to it. He got dressed and went downstairs. In the kitchen there were Tosh and their children and she was making breakfast.  
-Good morning! –he uttered, entering.  
-Hi daddy! –the kids replied together.  
-Good morning, love! –he repeated, coming up to Tosh, and kissing her. He told himself that they were still husband and wife and they had to pretend at least in front of their children. Toshiko was surprised, then she thought that, anyway, they couldn’t appear cold in front of the kids.  
-Did you sleep well? –she asked, washing the dishes, once the kids had gone to play outside.  
-Splendidly! –he smiled. –You know, I’ve been thinking last night and…  
-So have I. –she interrupted him, drying her hands, and turning to him.  
-Good… I was saying… for me it’s okay.  
-It’s okay? –she asked, puzzled.  
-This. Us, our children. That’s fine with me, I accept it.  
-What do you mean? We have to come back to the reality, you said it yourself yesterday, more than once.  
-No Tosh, this one is the reality we want! Look around you! This is what you craved for a long time, us married together, two children, a beautiful house and a good job. Everything’s perfect! I’m even starting to remember the period you were pregnant! –he concluded, incredulously.  
Toshiko looked at him, on second thought even she was starting to remember it, and that was odd.  
-And what about you? –she asked then, trying to pull that memory away. –This isn’t what you want, Owen.  
-Well, what do you know? It could be. We’re a team, aren’t we? We will be also this time and we’ll do what we’ve always done, we’ll make it work, together. Please! Give us a chance! We could have that date, tonight!  
-Owen…  
-Yes, of course, the kids! We can call a nanny! Or your parents…  
-Owen, I…  
-Please! –he interrupted her again. –Give me one day at least! I need it!  
Toshiko was torn, he was begging her and she wanted really hard the same thing.  
-I don’t know…  
-Just one day! And then… -he stopped.  
-And then?  
-I’m alive again, Tosh. You’ve no idea how much I missed it. It’s me, of the two of us, who has anything at all out there, not you. I wouldn’t have anything to lose!  
-Sure, I should have known. –she replied, hurt. She almost believed it, for a second. –You just needed to shag, yesterday! After all that time… and I was right there, ready and helpful!  
-Tosh, don’t…  
-The good old Tosh who would do everything for me! But you know what, Owen? I don’t care. I won’t stop loving you for this, because I know you, I know what you like and I accept it. But I also have thought about it and I decided that I want to come back to my life. I don’t care if we aren’t married, and you’ll go back not to see me, I just think this isn’t fair to stay here, for none of us.  
-No! Come on Tosh, how can you say that! There’s nothing out there worth coming back! Nothing! –he shouted, realizing he had started crying. –Every little thing! Like this! –he said, pointing at his own teary eyes. –Or this! –he continued, indicating the room where they were. –Or you! I can’t have anything of these out there! Is that what we really want? Come back to Jack? It’s because of Torchwood that I died! And Jack is the only one I have to thank if I’m stuck into this fucking bloody hell!  
-Jack didn’t mean to…  
-What? Of course, he had the best intentions on earth when he thought to bring me back! He didn’t wonder if maybe I would preferred a bit to stay dead! –he shouted, slamming his fist on the marble of the kitchen counter.  
-Owen, stop please! –she shouted back.  
His hand was aching and bleeding, he wasn’t used to feeling pain anymore and he cried louder.  
-Wait, I’ll find something to medicate you.

* * *

Jack had thought about the possibility that, together Owen and Toshiko had chosen not to come back on purpose. Or maybe, as far as he could know, it was him who convinced her to stay, telling her they had anything worth rousing. She had him and he a second chance to be alive again. He thought this since Owen volunteered to connect to her and to interfere with her dream. And yet, he had let him do it, he trusted him, and in his heart he hoped he would make the right choice. Although, he was wrong, and this disappointed him. Toshiko didn’t deserve that, unlike him, she still had something to lose.  
That night he hadn’t slept, he continued to blame himself for what was happening. He turned to his right, Ianto was sleeping like a baby. He smiled at him, then he sat on the bed and decided to get up.  
Owen and Toshiko were exactly as he had left them the night before. He went downstairs to check the monitors connected to her, and everything seemed to be normal. Suddenly, however, something caught his eyes, she had cried, there were marks of dried tears on her cheeks. He reached the coat rack, grabbed a handkerchief from his coat and soaked it. Then came back to them and bent over Toshiko to clean her face.  
-Why? -he whispered to her, thinking about the reason she could have cried in her dream, and then turned to Owen. They had made his head lean against the slab, to make him comfortable, although they knew it was useless. He looked at him, who seemed angry. He wondered if she cried because of him.  
Meanwhile, even Ianto got up. Realizing to be alone, he reached the main room of the Hub. He noticed Jack there, who looked thoughtful.  
-Hey, what are you thinking? –he asked, getting closer.  
The man turned to his direction and looked at him, keeping a worried look, which suddenly seemed to light up.  
-Why didn’t I think about it before? –he began, more to himself than to Ianto.  
-About what? –the young man asked, puzzled.  
-We’re bringing them back! –Jack replied, grinning, and rushing to the strongbox, letting Ianto noticeably confused. –Whether they like it or not! –he concluded, to himself.  
Later, when Gwen went to the Hub, she noticed them fiddling with some cables and a device she had never seen before.  
-What are you doing? –she asked, curiously.  
-Ianto? –Jack told, letting the other man answering in his place, too focused on his gimmicks to do it himself.  
-Jack found a way to bring Tosh and Owen back.  
-Really? And how? –she asked, suddenly rejoicing. She placed her handbag and got closer.  
-Apparently, among the several alien artefacts we conserve in the strongbox, there’s one able to convert other devices’ energy into itself, unpolarizing them, in order to demolish their strength and, consequently, any kind of electromagnetic signals, both terrestrial and alien. Was I all right? –he asked Jack, then.  
-Perfect! –he replied, winking at him, then he immediately came back to what he was doing. Ianto blushed and smiled pleased.  
-Have we got a device like that? Really? And what’s the point of it? –she asked, puzzled.  
-Disarm explosives, for instance! –Jack uttered. –Useful when there’s no time or the sappers are still sobering up, naked on your bed! –he continued, with a mischievous smirk. Ianto looked at him, annoyed. –I didn’t come up before, because it’s been here for decades and, you know, I’ve never had the memory of an elephant!  
-And will it work? –Gwen asked, hopefully.  
-I hope! I just have to find out how to turn it on, and to connect it to that bloody gizmo!

* * *

Tosh and Owen were sitting near the island in the middle of the kitchen. She was cleaning the blood from his knuckles, then she dipped a cotton bud in the alcohol, and rubbed with it the abraded skin.  
-I believe I deeply and secretly hate my hands! I try to destroy them in a lot of ways. A psychoanalyst would have great material to work with. –he observed, making the woman laugh.  
-At least it isn’t broken!  
-You would be a really bad doctor, Tosh. –he uttered. She looked at him, offended. –But an excellent nurse. –he continued, smiling. –Ouch! –he complained, then. –And to think I thought dreams were painless.  
-You’re telling. –she replied, gaze down, meaning something else.  
-Well? What do you think about my previous proposal? –he asked, pertaining to what he had told her earlier.  
-What did you mean a while ago, when you said this could be what you want? –she ignored his question, keeping her eyes down to what she was doing.  
He licked his lips, thinking about what to say.  
-Toshiko. –he looked at her, seriously. –You know perfectly well you are absolutely not unsympathetic to me. At least, I think you’ve understood it by now. –he gently smiled at her. Tosh looked at him in the eyes, she couldn’t hardly believe what he was telling her. –You’re very important to me, Tosh. What I’m saying is, I… Oh bugger! –he concluded, placing his free hand on his left temple and letting Tosh in suspense.  
-What’s wrong? –she asked him.  
-My head’s splitting!  
Toshiko didn’t even have the time to reply that she felt a terrible pain in her head. What the hell was happening?

* * *

-Come on, guys! –Jack implored, through his teeth. Once they had made work the device, they connected it to the artefact that was keeping Toshiko and Owen unconscious, and in his heart, he hoped everything would go exactly as he predicted.  
-What if it doesn’t work? –Ianto asked, reluctant.  
-It must work! –Gwen shut him up. –We cannot lose them!  
Suddenly, the artefact on Tosh’s head started to enlighten intermittently, before turning off and pulling away from her. It rose for some inches and turned into a bracelet, then dropped on the pavement.  
Ianto immediately grabbed it and placed it into a little box, which sealed, then turned to Tosh and Owen with the others.  
-Come on! –Jack repeated.  
Toshiko moved her head and slowly opened her eyes, patently dazed. Shortly later even Owen started moving.  
-Yeah! –Gwen shouted, literally jumping for joy.  
-Good morning, sleeping beauty! –Jack greeted her, grinning.  
Toshiko didn’t even have the time to sit down, that she was immediately embraced by him, then by Ianto, while Gwen rushed to hug Owen.  
-Careful! –he complained. –Before you smash my bones!  
-Oh, always the same! You, silly boy! –Gwen joked, tightening him, then she immediately embraced Tosh.  
-What’s happened? –she asked, stunned.  
-Well, let’s say that you just took some days off and I couldn’t afford to deprive myself of such a precious employee as you are! –Jack answered, without ceasing to grin.

  
Later, that evening, from the entrance of his office, Jack motioned for Owen to follow him in.  
The man flopped himself on the chair before Jack’s desk. He imagined exactly what he was about to tell him.  
-Owen, I decided to trust you. I agreed to let you enter into Toshiko’s dream, to bring her back to us, for her sake.  
-Her sake, Jack? You always know what’s best for everyone, don’t you? –he said, ironically.  
-Owen…  
-Of course, you couldn’t afford to lose us, too much effort to replace us, indeed. Starting again with the training…  
-Don’t say that!  
-You knew it, didn’t you? From the beginning, that we would have preferred a thousand times not to come back. And yet, you had to do it again, choose for the others one more time! It must be funny to play God, I’d like to try it myself, sometimes.  
-Owen! –Jack couldn’t believe it, his arrogance was going too far.  
-It’s easy for you, Jack, you’re not scared of anything, you have no idea what means to live like me! –he got up, staying bent with clenched fist on his desk. –I wish you felt just for a moment, what it’s like to be me! –he continued with a deeply angry voice. –What it’s like to have nothing. We were fine, Jack, really great, until you and your fucking selfishness meddled to ruin everything! Didn’t you wonder even for one second whether maybe she wanted it too? –he shouted.  
-How did you manage to convince her, Owen? Did you pretend to love her?  
-Fuck off, Jack! You know absolutely nothing!  
-Did you make her think what you wanted, so that she could let you stay with her? –Jack continued. –After you died, did you even lose your sense of decency, Owen? Using the feelings of the woman who loves you, only for your own personal gain. If I were you, I would think real hard, before calling someone selfish.  
Owen lowered his gaze, without knowing how to reply.  
-You’re right, Jack. As always. I’m such a terrible person. –he said then, scornfully. –But at the end, we’re not that different, you and I. –he concluded, coldly smiling at him.  
He slammed his fist on the desk and left the room.  
While exiting, he found Toshiko who hinted a smile, he glanced at her, hoping she hadn’t heard anything, then made his way to the sofa and sat down, thoughtfully.  
Tosh noticed he was looking angry and wondered what he and Jack had spoken about. She immediately reached him and sat near him.  
-Everything all right? –she asked, laying a hand on his knee. Owen looked at her and smiled, laying his broken hand on hers in turn.  
-Great! –he replied, without even trying to hide his sarcasm.  
-Do you remember what’s happened? –she asked, embarrassed.  
-Yes, something, but it’s vanishing. –he answered, looking away.  
-We didn’t actually… I mean… it was just a dream… -she said, noticeably blushing.  
-No, no! Of course not! Just a dream, you’ll see that tomorrow we’ll have forgotten everything. –he reassured her, forcing a smile, aware that, he probably couldn’t have done it even if he had wanted it.  
Tosh noticed a pensive tone of voice in him.  
-Good. –she replied, looking at their hands.  
-Yep. Now excuse me. –he concluded, getting up and going away.  
Tosh watched him walking, then her gaze turned to Jack, at his desk. She noticed he was looking at her, and immediately he smiled. She smiled back for a moment, before staring into the space, thoughtfully.  
Jack noticed she looked sad and wondered if his was actually selfishness. But he immediately pulled that thought away, coming to believe that it was the right choice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are at last! The story is finished! Yes, I know, there's no happy ending, but I wanted as much as I could to be close to what happened in season 2, without messing up with the official plot and the characters ending (we have to complain to Mr Davies for this!). Finally in this chapter there's more Jack, and a mention of Janto(!). I voluntarily decided not to clarify Owen's feelings toward Tosh, first because I'm not totally sure about them (although I hope that in his heart he loved her), then because this isn't actually clear even in their last episode (unfortunately).  
> Well, what to say, I apologize again for my terrible mistakes, and I hope you enjoyed it in any case as much as I enjoyed writing it! ^^


End file.
